When You're Gone
by LittleMissHerondale
Summary: He just hopes that one day he'll wake up and she'll be there again.


**I have no idea what inspired this one-shot, but I couldn't stop writing until it was finished. This is definitely a lot different to what I usually write but I'm very happy with it. Please read and review to give me your thoughts.**

**DISCLAIMER: As much as I'd like to believe I do, I don't own the Mortal Instruments **

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He leans against the cold stone and closes his eyes. When he opens them again she's standing there in front of him in her ridiculously high heels. The wind blows her long black hair, making it billow around her face. Her cheeks are stained pink from the cold, but her dark eyes are staring back at him longingly. She's dressed in black like usual and he can see her fresh marks just peeping out from beneath her collar.

"Hey," he says and smiles up at her.

She smiles back at him and then sits down. They're like puzzle pieces, fitting perfectly together as he tucks her into his side. He'll never get tired of the warmth of her body against his or of how her inky black hair tickles his chin as she places her head against his chest.

"I've missed you," he confesses and from the look in her eyes he knows that she's missed him too. He keeps talking softly to her and she seems content at just being able to hear his voice. He tells her all about this movie that he knows she'll love and about the jacket he saw the other day that made him think of her.

"It's been quiet since you left," he tells her and it's true. The sound of her laughter hasn't filled the empty space. Nor has the sound of her shoes clacking against the floor boards. No matter how much he'd longed for the sound of her voice, it never came. But she was here now, sitting with him, and that was all that mattered. It didn't matter that it was quiet now because she was by his side.

"I went for a walk the other day and I could've sworn you were following me," he announces after a while. She looks up at him and smiles because she knows that's what he needs. Ever since she'd left he saw her everywhere he went. And each time it only got more painful as he reminded himself that it wasn't her. But somehow her smile manages to erase all of the pain and fill him with a happiness he hadn't felt since he saw her last.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, barely loud enough to be heard. She looks at him and she can see how hard this is on him. He knows it's not his fault. He knew that this would eventually happen. But it doesn't make it any easier. He once promised her that he would never leave her side and she promised him the same. And even though it was her who left, he still feels guilty. He can't help but think and wonder what would have happened if she had of stayed. But of course no matter what he comes up with, none of it is true. None of it was possible.

He remembers something and laughs. Her curious gaze prompts him to tell her. Soon enough he feels her body shaking against his chest as her melodious laugh joins his. It reminds him of how much he missed that sound. And now that it was back he is able to smile again. And just like that it's no longer silent. He makes it his duty to keep talking. To do what he must, just as long as that laugh never vanishes.

Hours pass but the couple remain seated, neither willing to leave the other's side. He fears that if he leaves she will disappear again. And now that he's no longer feeling empty he is not sure if he can cope with things going back to how they were before. How they were without her there. He tells her this.

It breaks her heart to hear how much he's struggling without her. She wishes that it didn't have to be that way. That he didn't have to go through all he did. She looks at him and her eyes are teary. He can see the pain in them. In all honesty she's been struggling too. She wishes he could follow her, but she knows she could never ask him to do that. So instead she stays wrapped in his arms and intends to remain that way for as long as possible. She dreads the time he'll have to let go.

Deep down, he knows that she is only a figment of his imagination. The warmth of her body pressed against his, that tickle he can feel on his chin and her laugh ringing in his ears. They're just memories. They aren't real. She wasn't just laughing. Nor is she in his embrace, because really she isn't there. She just wasn't there and it was killing him inside.

He knows if he speaks to her now, she won't answer. Just like every other time he's spoken to her since she left. But he still talks. She's a good listener. And just maybe he still hangs on to the hope that someday she will answer him. Someday he hopes he will wake up and it will all have been a bad dream.

He hopes that one day he will wake up and she'll be lying next to him like she's supposed to. He hopes that he'll walk into the kitchen and she'll be trying to cook some exotic dish. He hopes that she'll be sitting next to him playing video games. He just hopes that one day he'll wake up and she'll be there again.

He knows he has to leave soon. He's been delaying for quite some time now because he knows as soon as he gets up she will be gone. She will be gone and that thought just tears him apart. But they both know that he has to go. And they both know how hard it is. No matter how many times they've done it, it never gets any easier.

"I don't want to leave because that's when you're gone," he quietly confesses. "That's when I know you aren't here. That's when I know how broken I truly am."

And he could've sworn she answered him this time. He could've sworn he heard her voice. He could've sworn she told him she wouldn't go anywhere. He could've sworn she promised him that.

With her words he found the strength to stand up. He looked to the stone he'd been resting against and sighed. He closed his eyes and opened them again, but no amount of wishful thinking could remove the name printed upon it. No matter how hard he tried, her name would remain preserved on the stone.

One hundred years on and Simon was only just coming to terms with her death. He looked back to her grave stone one last time and he saw her waving to him. He knew that Isabelle would still be there next time he came. She wasn't going anywhere. Just like she promised.


End file.
